Friday 31 October 2008

THE HORROR! THE HORROR!

Miss Black glides down the street to an internal Hammer Horror soundtrack, she stops to check her hair and make-up in the vast windows of Top Shop – a blood-curdling scream… there is no reflection… just a vacant day-glo mannequin gazing back… the Hammer Horror organ music spills out into the high street, and Miss Black takes flight…





























Ladytron – Miss Black




Quick! Hide! It’s Darren Spooner - skeletal-thin and dirty-faced. He’s been at the grease-paint again, and he’s wielding a bull-whip with dastardly intent… WHIP-CRAAAAAACKKKK - the werewolf howls and a menacing electro-glitter-beat kicks in.

Mother nature’s beasts gather and circle: eager to please and hungry for blood… For he is the Beastmaster…


























Relaxed Muscle – Beastmaster




Groping around in the darkness, your heart races. A howling gale has just blown up, the unmistakable CREEEEEEEAAKKKKKK of a coffin lid sends a shiver down your spine…
















[Rod explanation below – thanks to Go Faster for the funny pic]

The Moontrekkers – Night of The Vampire

[this was famously banned by the BBC as being “unsuitable for people of a nervous disposition”. Joe Meek throws down a spine-chilling tape collage and The Moontrekkers stomp out a surf-guitar & Clavioline-fuelled nightmare. Real horror-show!]

[And now an explanation about the Rod Stewart picture: A little known group called The Raiders arrived at Joe Meek’s studio for an audition. Joe was enjoying the noise until their vocalist, a young Rod Stewart, opened his mouth. Joe stood with his fingers in his ears going LA-LA-LA until Rod stopped, and was promptly dismissed. Meek signed the band and they became his house band from then on. Conclusion: even Joe Meek who was famously tone-deaf couldn’t bear the sound of Rod’s gravelly tones]




Eeeeeeek! This one really gives me the heebee-geebies. It’s the bit where he starts sounding like an evil demented muppet talking to itself “do you know the beast who discovered the internal calculus?” Scary…






























Evariste - Connais-Tu I'animal Qui Inventa Le Calcul Integral


[there’s a French wikipedia entry on Evariste, and not much else - here’s a rather poor Google English translation (click the link to Joel Sternheimer - his real name). It seems Evariste had a PhD in theoretical physics, but decided he wanted to make frightening psychedelic records to scare the be-jeezus out of folks like you and me.]




In need of a little light relief after Evariste brought the heavies ‘round? How about Future Bible Heroes’ ode to the joys of being a vampire:



























“I survived for 700 years and I still look seventeen”… hmmm, me thinks they may be exaggerating a teeny bit.

Future Bible Heroes – I’m A Vampire





[psssst! Spiked Candy made a trick or treat post last Hallowe’en, and it seems there are still a few mp3 links working including Stella’s wordily titled ‘Si vous connaissez quelque-chose de pire qu'un vampire, parlez m'en toujours, ça pourra peut-être me faire sourire’ (translation: ‘If you know of something worse than a vampire, tell me, it will make me smile’).  Spiked Candy has been VERY quiet for a while now, we hope she comes back soon]


2 comments:

John said...

Christ that Evariste song is disturbing.
thanks for the music

Dom said...

Hi John, thanks for the comment.
I spent a rather hungover morning-after-the-halloween-party with the Evariste song nagging in my poor brain - it wasn't the best cure, I have to say!
Don't have nightmares.
Domx